OET LETTER CORRECTION
Mr Lionel Ramamurthy – Grade C
When writing your letter, you should do it under the same circumstances of the exam day. Therefore, we suggest you write your letter within the required time. Then retype it into the word document and send that to us.
Ms Georgine Ponsford
Resident Community Nurse
Community Retirement Home
103 Light Street
Dear Ms Ponsford,
Re:Mr Lionel Ramamurthy, aged 63 years
I am writing to sending Mr Ramamurthy back into your care following a discharge. He has been made a good recovery after diagnosed with pneumonia .
- To send (verbs are in the infinitive form after “to”)
- After being diagnosed (the passive voice is required as the patient is the object who was diagnosed by someone else)
During hospitalisation , Mr Ramamurthy had shortness of breath, persistent cough and experienced weakness, for which deep breathing exercises and cough exercises have been commenced. Kindly encourage him to continue with these exercises. Also, please ensure him to sit right up for postural drainage. Although, he can ambulate with a pick-up frame , still he requires assistance in his daily activities like showering and toileting .
- A weak structure. You need to bind your sentences together for a better coherence. “kindly encourage the patient to continue with exercises and ensure him to ….”
- Although he can ambulate with a pick – up frame, still he requires … (the comma is after the first clause, not after “although)
As Mr Ramamurthy has gained weighed, he will need to be monitored his balanced diet which will include plenty of fluids, eggs, fruits and vegetables . Therefore, facilitation to drink fluids and have proper nutrition need to be monitored.
- He will need to monitor his balanced diet, or his balanced diet will need to be monitored (correct forms)
It would be great if you could keep Mr Ramamurthy warm and give him paracetamol if needed. He is afebrile and his inflammatory markers are back to normal.
Should you require any information please do not hesitate to contact me.
Personalised tips for your next letter
To improve your score, you need to:
- You need to read more medical articles to improve your writing
- Your structure is simple. Bind sentence together with correct punctuation and more linking words for a better a better structure
- Make sure your tenses are correct. Use a better variety of tenses to enhance your score
- Check your punctuation to avoid confusion
Any estimated grade score is based on the information you have provided to us, however your score will always vary depending on the task and the circumstances at the time of writing.
ESTIMATED GRADE: C
Comments on scores
Overall Task Fulfilment – 4
You have shown the ability to manage the task and organise the information in a logical way., but there are some mistakes in information order. Significant grammar errors and inaccuracies have a negative effect on the target reader in places. You are clearly familiar with the style of the letter but simply don’t have sufficient control of the language required.
Appropriateness of Language – 4
You have chosen vocabulary and tone which are generally appropriate for the target reader and the communicative task . A few inaccuracies do not impede communication. As a whole, the letter is not well organised.
Comprehension of Stimulus – 4
You demonstrate an understanding of the task and input which is generally accurate. Many of the main points are explained clearly and given an appropriate degree of prominence. You should determine relevant, semi relevant and irrelevant information. Select the important ones
Control of Linguistic Features (Grammar and Cohesion) – 4
You have used a range of devices to connect information, there are some errors regarding tenses, articles and the passive voice.
Control of Presentation Features (Spelling, Punctuation and Layout) – 4
You have chosen a good layout, but there are some punctuation errors and word formation mistakes
You will find a great selection of sample answers on the internet, however you may be required to join a selection of Facebook groups for that. However we are adding some examples to our website (regularly) and you can find them under the following link(s):
To help you improve further we are happy to provide two links to information that will ensure you are more aware of the OET letter writing task.
You will find an OET Writing Guide at this link: https://oetspeaking.com/oetwriting/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/OET_Writing_Guide.pdf
As well as OET Letter Writing General Tips at this link: https://oetspeaking.com/oetwriting/wp-content/uploads/2018/06/OET-Letter-General-Tips.pdf
You will find a great selection of sample answers on the internet, however you may be required; please do consider joining our Facebook group for assistance: https://www.facebook.com/groups/oetwritingcorrectionservice/
You will find a great selection of sample answer on the official OET website. I do suggest browsing there.
Sending Letters: We welcome all OET letters for correction to be sent by e-mail to a specially designated e-mail address at [email protected].
We do need to stress that you have to include some important information within the email, these are: Order ID, Letter Number, Service Type and Your Name.
Here’s an example:
78901, 2, Standard, Mohamed Youssef.
It is that simple!
Under the new system, you will receive a generic auto-reply within a few minutes of your e-mail being received.
Please feel free to send your letters one by one or all at the same time, the decision is yours.
Failure to send your letter with the above information in the email
will result in your letter not being processed for correction.
The comma is the most frequently used punctuation mark within sentences. Used correctly it allows the writer to separate a group of words or phrase from other parts of a sentence. This is necessary in order to add useful information in a sentence. The information can be added at the beginning, the middle or the end. However, if commas are not used or overused, the meaning can be affected and the flow of information disrupted. By understanding the basic rules presented in this section you should be able to develop a good understanding of how and when to use commas in referral letters.
Rules of Usage
1. The Adverbial Phrase: The adverbial phrase can be used in referral letters to provide information such as a time, place, context, emphasis or mood in the sentence which is to follow and it is commonly separated by a comma
- Context: On examination, there was slight tenderness in the right fornix.
- Date: On today’s visit, the patient was pale and sweaty.
- Emphasis: Please note, the patient is allergic to penicillin.
- Mood: Unfortunately, the patient’s condition has worsened. Note, mood or comment adverbs, such as unfortunately or regrettably convey the health professionals concern toward the patient’s condition and are therefore effective ways of displaying emphathy.
- Contrast: The patient’s condition has improved. However, a follow up visit is required.
|Blank||I||suspect||the patient has developed ectopic pregnancy.|
|Comma preferred||Unfortunately,||I||suspect||the patient has developed ectopic pregnancy.|
|Blank||Abdominal examination||revealed||slight right iliac fossa tenderness.|
|Comma preferred||On examination,||slight right iliac fossa tenderness||was revealed.||blank|
|Blank||Clinical examination of hard tissues||revealed||a large mesioincisal fracture.|
|Comma preferred||On examination,||a large mesioincisal fracture||was revealed.||blank|
|Comma preferred||Regarding her medical history,||she||has been suffering from||asthma for which she uses a ventolin inhaler.|
|Comma preferred||On review today,||there||was||no improvement in her condition.|
|Comma preferred||In terms of his medical history,||he||is||a heavy smoker and a heavy to moderate drinker.|
|Comma preferred||Please note,||the patient||has||an appointment with his physiotherapist at 10 o’clock on Monday.|
|Comma preferred||In addition,||there||are||composite and amalgam restorations on several teeth.|
Handy Hint: Do not put a comma between a subject and a verb or a verb and an object.
2. Appositives: This is a noun or a noun phrase that is placed after another noun to explain or identify it. It has a very important use in the introductory sentence of referral letters as follows.
- Mr Smith, an 80 year old widow, was admitted to hospital with complaints of heart palpitations.
- Thank you for seeing Jordan, a 10 year old boy who presented at my clinic today with a main concern of pain in tooth 54.
- I am writing to refer Mrs. Bradley, a 42 year old married woman who is suffering from cancer.
- Conditional Sentences: These sentences are frequently used in the conclusion of a referral letter and the rules are as follows:
- Use a comma if the if clause is at the beginning of the sentence.
- If you could take over her antenatal care,it would be much appreciated.
- If you have any further questions regarding this patient, please don’t hesitate to call me.
- Don’t use a comma if the if clause is at the end of the sentence.
- It would be greatly appreciated if you could take over her antenatal care.
- Please don’t hesitate to call me if you have any further questions regarding this patient.
- Complex sentences:
- Use a comma if the dependent clause is at the beginning of the sentence.
- In case of irritation, redness or swelling, please consult your doctor.
- When the results become available, I will forward them to you.
- Because of her deteriorating condition, the patient was admitted to hospital.
- Don’t use a comma if the dependent clause is at the end of the sentence.
- Please consult your doctor in case of irritation, redness or swelling.
- I will forward the results to you when they become available.
- The patient was admitted to hospital because of her deteriorating condition.
- Comma Splices: A comma splice is two sentences joined together with a comma, but no conjunction. This is an error as the information must be either joined with a coordinating conjunction such as and/but/or or a new sentence must be started.
- He does not have any dental experience, he is worried about the pain.(incorrect)
- He does not have any dental experience and he is worried about the pain.(correct)
- He does not have any dental experience. Therefore, he is worried about the pain.(correct)
- Noun Clauses beginning with that should not be separated by a comma.
- It is also important to know, that a re-check is organised for the 31.5.2009 at 10:30 in order to remove the suture. (incorrect)
- It is also important to know that a re-check is organised for the 31.5.2009 at 10:30 in order to remove the suture.(correct)
- Use commas to separate three or more words, phrases, or clauses written in a series.The final word does not require a comma and it should be separated by a conjunction such as and or or
- Mrs. Olsen has a history of hypertension, hypothyroidism, glaucoma for which she is on regular medication. (incorrect)
- Mrs. Olsen has a history of hypertension, hypothyroidism and glaucoma which is on regular medication. (correct)
|On review today Mr Walker has reduced smoking from 20 to 10 cigarettes per day. On examination today there was a soft fluctuant swelling palpable on the left cheek Regrettably she has problems with breast feeding and caring for the baby. Please note he has a prosthetic heart valve. Comma preferred for adverbial phrases. Refer to rule 1 above.||On review today, Mr Walker has reduced smoking from 20 to 10 cigarettes per day. On examination today, there was a soft fluctuant swelling palpable on the left cheek Regrettably, she has problems with breast feeding and caring for the baby. Please note, he has a prosthetic heart valve.|
|I am writing to refer Mr. Jones a 57 year old man who was admitted to hospital on the 18th of July, diagnosed with myasthenia gravis. Mr Jones, a 57 year old man was admitted to hospital on the 18th of July, diagnosed with myasthenia gravis. Comma required for appositives. Refer to rule 2 above.||I am writing to refer Mr. Jones, a 57 year old man who was admitted to hospital on the 18th of July, diagnosed with myasthenia gravis. Mr Jones, a 57 year old man, was admitted to hospital on the 18th of July, diagnosed with myasthenia gravis.|
|Apply the comma rule for conditional sentences. Refer to rule 3 above.|
|Apply the comma rule for complex sentences. Refer to rule 4 above.|
|He has an allergy to nuts, once he was hospitalised for severe anaphylactic reaction. Refer to rule 6 above.||He has an allergy to nuts and was once hospitalised for severe anaphylactic reaction.|
|Please note that, Daniel has an allergy to peanuts. Apply the comma rule for comma splices. Refer to rule 5 above.||Please note that Daniel has an allergy to peanuts.|
|Mr.Farrah, presented at my surgery today complaining of pain radiating from his left ear to his front teeth. Do place a comma between the subject and verb of a sentence.||Mr.Farrah presented at my surgery today complaining of pain radiating from his left ear to his front teeth.|
|Initial examination revealed, complete edentulous upper and lower jaws with healthy soft tissue. I am writing to request, visits for this family. Do place a comma between the verb and object of a sentence.||Initial examination revealed complete edentulous upper and lower jaws with healthy soft tissue. I am writing to request visits for this family.|